The Three Day Rule Is Dead

Audrey Hepburn  Image Source

Audrey Hepburn Image Source

This is a public service announcement for everyone born before 1995. We may have spent half our lives texting, but we also grew up in a time when it seemed every sitcom, romantic comedy (and hell, wasn't there even a CSI episode?) proliferated this one simple concept: the so-called “three day rule”, which stipulated that a man was to wait three days after a date before calling a woman if he were interested. Our young minds were shaped amid this rampant propaganda, so let me be the first to offer you my condolences; the three day rule is dead.

It’s no secret that thanks to online dictionaries, Amazon Prime and Tinder, our generation’s proclivity for instant gratification has made its way into the observable public psyche. In the dating world this amounts to a general acceptance that “dick pics will happen” (Oh, I almost want to embroider that on a pillow now) and a hook up culture that rivals the free love movement of the sixties. Its hallmarks are men with short attention spans and high expectations and women with addictions to attention and vanity, a vicious and self-serving romantic landscape that leaves us at once distrustful and untrustworthy, the most genuine parts of ourselves bereft. This time, though, this new and brutal method of love-warfare may be working in our favor; the three day rule, whose history is as rich and ancient as the telephone itself, dies here with us.

I’ve done a certain amount of “academic research “ in this field. In fact, I have done more “academic research” than I’d like to admit. And I can tell that in my vast, vast experience, only one rule stands true: If a guy likes you, he will text you after the date. That's right. That night. No exceptions.

Don’t go asking your mom for advice on this one, ladies, because the men of her time could not type their wildest fantasy into a search engine and have a full length film of it in three seconds. For better or worse, millennial men know what they like, are used to getting it fast and will let you know right away if you’re on their mind.

Ignore this rule at your peril: If he likes you, he will text you after the date. If he doesn’t, let it go. And If he texts you “you up?" at 4 am, don’t go in there, IT’S A TRAP!!


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